Minion Monday – Top 10 Things I Never Thought I Would Be Happy About
Something new is happening in my house. I can add a new thing to the list of things I never thought you would be happy about.
The list is kinda long, but the top ten things are.
Top 10 Things I Never Thought I Would Be Happy About
- Cursing (yes I danced when he cursed the 1st time and used it appropriately before I corrected him.)
- Lying (he lied for the 1st time and I knew then he knew what his words really mean)
- Hurting someone’s feelings, on purpose. (because he realized his words have the power to do that)
- Voluntarily wearing clothing (enough said)
- Hiding that he has not done a chore (he ran ahead and tried to distract me so I wouldn’t know he had not made his bed)
- Requesting food, even for the 10th time in one day. (because he would rather just make himself something than ask for something and sometimes he goes weeks at a time eating the same thing several times a day)
- Sneaking (when he snuck chips in his room the 1st time I caught him he got in trouble so the next time he wanted to do it he snuck them so I wouldn’t know which told me he understood what I was saying the 1st time.)
- Telling me no and meaning it.
- Stealing (He was 8 and he took a video game in a gamestop. He hid it under his shirt knowing he wanted it but couldn’t have it, he showed me he understood no and what it meant to him)*
- Manipulation (see below)
I am sure after reading this list you are either A. Shaking your head yes, or B. Wondering what kind of parent I am.
Before I had Zach I would have been in the second group. Now? Firmly in the 1st, not only would I be shaking my head yes I would be cheering both mom and kid on!
This week I add Manipulation to my list. Zach wanted something, I don’t even remember what, but I knew it was something I didn’t have money for. I told him no, and he huffed off. About 10 minutes later he was back asking again. This time when I said no he cuddled up to me and started kissing my cheek, then he looked at me with big puppy dog eyes and said “please”.
This time it broke my heart to tell him no. I did end up getting it, a couple of days later.
I know it seems funny the things we cheer. The things other parents often take as a horrible thing, or as a given. When you have a child with autism not much is a given anymore, not much is expected.
Sometimes you go weeks at a time just hoping that something new doesn’t send him into a regression or hurt him. You pray that today he finds the words to tell you what is wrong rather than stim, or meltdown. You sit next to his bed and cry wondering why you can’t help him, why he doesn’t come into our world a bit more and why when you hold him it seems like it hurt him.
Then other days he takes your heart and twists it around his little finger and you do anything just to see his smile, hear his laugh and encourage each developmental milestone, good or bad.
Funny when I started my journey as a mom I knew it would change me. However, I never knew it would make me realize how very important everything is, good and bad. Even little things like wearing pants.
*btw I didn’t let him get away with it and I left dad with the other kids and took him out to the car and had a nice long talk where I only yelled a little…. maybe a bit more than a little..