The ugly truth about being a Mom.
I follow a lot of blogs, autism, non-autism, food blogs.
Every where I look I see one commonality.
We all think we are doing a crappy job as parents. Maybe not all the time, but pretty often.
We make resolutions to stop yelling, to make the punishment fit the crime, to feed them better.. Whatever it is you THINK you are failing at..
The truth is,
You are not failing.
This past week my hubby gained a new appreciation for me as a Mom. You see he had jury duty. The case was the state trying to sever parental rights of a craptastic mom. After his court case hubby came home and hugged me hard. He said, “Do you think you are a good mom?” At first I didn’t know what to say. I just stood there.. My 1st thought was, why would he ask, what had I done that made him question me? Then I turned to him and said, “I am doing my very best.” He smiled and said “That is enough.”
I know, there are a million ways to screw up your kids.
I know I am not a perfect parent, far from it.
I just realize I am not screwing up as much as I worry I am.
All I can do, it my very best.
I am horribly hard on myself. I always have been.
It doesn’t help that society is also hard on moms.
We are always being judged with every moment in public. When did our society become so judgmental anyway?
A dear friend of mine said today ” Society is going to judge you anyway, so do what ever you want to do.”
She is right. (Thanks Lisa!)
It doesn’t matter if your child is nt, asd, or something else. Everyone is going to judge you. Life and how you live it is your choice. You have to do what works for you. What makes your family happy, most of all you have to do what is right in your mind.
Not everyone will agree with it. That is not only okay, it is actually pretty great. It means you are not just going with the flow, it shows that you are doing what works for you. Which is more important to have the approval of anyone outside your family. What works for you might not help someone else. The reverse is also true.
Do your very best, be strong. love your kids with all your heart, make sure they are as healthy as you can manage and they know they are loved.
So go ahead and worry a little about yelling, keep hiding those veggies where you can but remember you are probably doing better than you think. Unless you are selling your kids into a slave ring, or abusing them give yourself a break.
The ugly truth is we are harder on ourselves that we deserve.
Mom, grandmom, dad, single parent, whatever you might be, give yourself a pat on the back and realize your parent(s) probably wondered the same things. They worried the same way and you still grew up and became a pretty awesome person. Chances are, so will your kids.
Happy Monday! Go take on the day!